Don't read this if....

....you are at all freaked out about talk of big floppy boobies.  Yes, I said boobies... right here on my family friendly blog.  So, if you are shy, or hope I am, stop reading this and check back another day.

I am a big girl.  I wear it proudly.  I can throw my should behind a stalled car and push it out of the roadway.  I can help move furniture. I can hold my own in a wrestling match with my big giant son.

I have always been a tall woman at 5'9 and have been overweight most of my adult life (thanks to my husband).  A big, giant rear end and big front end have always been part of the package.  Of course, the package has now been upgrade to the deluxe model and now includes a big belly (thanks, son) but non of this has really been a problem for me.  I am not proud of being overweight, just realistic.

Bot the one thing that has always been at the forefront (pun intended) has been my... well. front.  And, let's face it, take a set of DDDs and age them 30+ years (yes, I'm 48 but I have only had them since my teens), and you kinda get an idea of what probably happens.

I don't own any of those one hook, lace, cute colored sexy bras.  No, mine are utilitarian white and industrial strength.  It takes five hooks on the back to keep these girls contained.  Yes, five.  I know, most of you have never seen a five hook bra but trust me, they ain't dainty.

But, what happens over time is that my industrial strength bras eventually get old and tire.  The elastic starts to stretch and they just can't do the job they were brought here to do.  I end up spending the day tugging and readjusting.  Clothes start to become ill fitting and, I actually look heavier and the girls bigger when the bras start to fail.

I can't buy my bras in the store.  They just don't carry them.  And even if they did, who can afford retail.  So, every so often, when I get tired of the old, tired bras, I order a set of 8 online (one for each day of the week and one for wash day). 

I just want to proudly announce that the new bras have just come in and today is what I call "New Boob Day".  The girls are perched right where they are supposed to be  They no longer hop around when I move.  I could probably actually run (if I wanted to and if a bear was chasing me) without getting a concussion.  I have the rack of a 20 year old girl.... OK, that is a bit much but I do look much smaller and younger.

So, everyone, please be happy for me and help me celebrate "New Boob Day" while we can ... trust me, it will soon me over.